What is in a name?

How long does it take for you to name your children? Took us the whole pregnancy and a few more days after birth. Actually, maybe even before pregnancy. When we decided that we'll try for another baby, we started throwing out names once in awhile to seek each other's opinions.

We always come up with both boys' and girls' names. Just in case. It's fun to run through names and check out each other's responses. I think it's very stressful to be dealing with children and names at the same time.

For both our children we have names ready for the hospital. A few of them, in fact. I'm glad we both are parents who need to see their children first before naming them, because I am this kind of person. If my husband wasn't, I'd be living in frustration and doubt throughout the pregnancy wondering if the name fits my child.

There's been quite a lot of news about celebrity baby names and to be honest, I sympathise with the children. Why do celebrities' children have to have odd names?

Was it last year that a Chinese couple wanted to name their child @. Then another couple wanting to name their child Facebook?

It really took us a good 6 months to come up with a list of names and then narrowing it down to final three. For both girls. The first one was easy as we already had names in mind. The second one was trickier as our favourite girls' name was taken.

Some have asked why it took us so long to decide upon a name. I always respond with this : A name is for life. It has to be fitting, meaningful, and the child proud to be called by. They will be using their given name the rest of their lives. Why make it difficult for them?

We are all called by God to be His children. He knows us by our names, our characters, our thoughts and deeds. God has put in a lot of thought into the making of a baby that will one day grow into an adult. Then, shouldn't we, as stewards of God, should put in a bit more thought into our children's names?

A friend inboxed me recently asking how I gave my girls their Chinese names. One of the suggestions I gave to her is to pray about it. Not trying to boast of how holy I am, which I can tell you I am far from! But that if God had given us this kicking little life to be brought up, I'm sure He has in mind a name for him/her. For both my girls, God has placed circumstances in our way to guide us in naming our children. He cares for all our needs, every little thing. If God can give names to people in the Bible, He sure can do it today.

The next time you're pregnant and is stuck for names, pray. God will provide.
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Learning to read

Ever since Miss 4 went to childcare, she's had a lot more exposure and opportunities to sing, read, write and learn about the English language.

Over the last 1.5 yrs, her English vocabulary has increased by leaps and bounds, which led me to believe that it is not necessary to teach my children English as they can pick it up very quickly when with peers.

Maybe this one is just a high-achiever, but she has a very good memory for learning new things. And when it comes to languages, she just needs to hear it a few times, practice it and it's perfect. Teaching her to read her Chinese characters were easy too. As Chinese characters stem from drawings in the early days, I draw out words and that helped her to remember the meaning and the word.

She now has a word count of over 80 Chinese characters, much less than her asian counterparts, but it's not important to me. She enjoys learning new words and will not hesitate to ask how to read a new word and its meaning.

I have not been teaching her English and all her English words and recognition came from childcare. They are learning some phonics and she comes back asking how to sound a letter. I took the opportunity to teach her the sounds of the letter in both English and Mandarin. Surprisingly, it does not confuse her. It would have confused me as an adult, but I suppose children have no pre-conception of languages and just take in whatever is taught to them.

So, Miss 4 is progressing well in her language skills, both reading and speaking. I've not pushed her to write in Chinese, so she really can't write. Probably time to put in more effort on my part.

And now with Korean and Japanese dramas going crazy around the house, she has picked up quite a few phrases and enjoying it. Who knows, we might have a linguist in the future! Sphere: Related Content

New addition to the family

It's been over a year since my last blog post and the main changes would be having a baby added to the family.

I've quite forgotten what it's like to have sleepless nights until Miss H was born. This one is different from the first which I very quickly found out.

She refuses to drink cow's milk.
She refuses to take the teat.
She is fully breast-fed.
She grows faster than I can change her wardrobe.
She stood up before she could turn herself or crawl.
She climbed steps before she could walk.

There are so many differences that I feel like I'm learning to be a mum all over again. All the experiences from the first child just flew out the window.

However, there's one thing in common between the two girls. They are both miss independents. They know what they want and will persist till they get it.

This reminds me of two parables in the Bible in the book of Luke. One is the persistent widow who asked the judge to right a wrong and the other is of a man who knocked on his friend's door to ask for food. Both eventually received what they asked for because of their persistence.

I see the same persistence in my children. They will keep on at it till I give it to them. It'll have to be something that is suitable for their age. If only, as an adult, I have the same persistence as they do, in praying and seeking God! There is plenty to learn from the simple faith of our children! Sphere: Related Content

Childcare

Miss 3 has started her kindy at a nearby childcare centre since the last week of April. So far, she's been happy during her days there, except for the parting tears.

Yesterday, she said that she didn't want to go to kindy because she doesn't like a 'bad' teacher. Children can't lie. They're so real. They imitate and they remember. Apparently, the 'bad' teacher told her to sleep but she didn't want to. She only wanted to sleep at home with me.

We asked her then, when mummy and daddy tell you to sleep and keep repeating ourselves, does that mean that we're 'bad' parents? She said no.

This morning when I dropped her off, she pointed out the 'bad' teacher. I don't think there's anything bad about the teacher, and truly they do get tired looking after a bunch of preschoolers. Unfortunately, the 'bad' teacher came to pick her from me and she screamed more than she did before.

I'm glad to have another day to myself to do things before baby comes along, but felt sorry for my precious one. She has learnt to dislike and instead of seeing everything as good, there is a negative side to things. It's part of growing up, I suppose, but it hurts to know that a pure and innocent spirit has to change. I hope my children will keep their innocence and simplicity towards life, but still be watchful of danger.

It was good when God created the universe and everything in it, but sin has caused it to change... Sphere: Related Content

Do you smack your child(ren)?

Am following a fan page on Facebook and one of the status updates a few days ago asked its fans if they smacked their children in public on the legs or on the bum when they misbehaved.

Interestingly the response was mostly 50-50. Some have done so, some haven't and will not.

Those who had, did it because warnings and time outs have failed them while they were out and so a smack was issued. For some it was also a case of a dangerous act, like running across the road without waiting.

The other party who did not and refused to do it are against any form of physical punishment and deem it as an act of violence and abuse. One of them would have liked to 'report' some of the posts.

As I read the comments with interest and some disbelief, I must admit that I will smack my child in public if that's the last thing that will get the message across. I do smack at home too. And I do give warnings.

You may disagree with my point of view though.

I nearly smacked Miss 3 once for running across the road without waiting for me, which she was always told to do so. The best part was, she didn't even look out for cars. I went after her, with my big belly threatening to bounce off the body and gave her a stern lecture on the other side. The look on her face told me that she got the message and will not require a smack to enforce that message of danger. However, there were times when I was home and she would push boundaries. When 3 warnings and a time out didn't work, she got a smack on the bum.

I don't encourage physical punishment, although I grew up with them. The Bible says, "He who spares the rod hates his son, but he who loves him is careful to discipline him." Proverbs 13:24.

It does not promote punishment by the rod, but it does mean strict discipline by the parent. In love.

And when it comes to discipline, I have to admit that every child is different. There is no one set method that can be used to discipline every child.

And so, back to the discussion on the fan page. From what I've read, none of the parents sounded like they were abusive. And the reason behind the smack were mostly due to plenty of warnings given or in dangerous situations. Sphere: Related Content

Vaginal Birth After Caesarean

I'm now 29 weeks into my pregnancy and for a few months, I've been having this nagging thought and desire to have a vaginal birth. Did lots of reading on the internet and spoke to people who have gone through vaginal birth after caesarean, or VBAC in short.

The consensus is that, it's a much safer option than another round of caesarean and really, God did make us to give birth vaginally too. But I'm sure times have changed over the years, with diet, lifestyle and medical technology - more and more women are going through caesarean, rather than vaginal birth.

I wanted to make a last proposal to my OB/GYN for a VBAC and hear what my risks and chances are. He said that in most cases, it is possible to do a VBAC if the first caesarean was a distressed baby. i.e., if the child was breeched, or low placenta, or premmie. But, in my case, I had the full labour but bub was stuck and did not progress as my cervix did not widen, so a VBAC could result in the same situation and needing emergency caesarean. Hearing that, my heart sank somewhat.

I can give birth safely, but the chances of my baby born safely and smoothly would be a 50-50 chance. At this, I only had half my hopes left.

The clincher came when he said that I have a low placenta. Sigh. What hopes have I left? Caesarean it is then.

It was a rather painful decision to do a caesarean, even though I know that it is all for the good of the baby and myself. Definitely not looking forward to 6-weeks of painkillers and not able to drive on my own. But, thankful that God has given mankind the intelligence to advance medical technology to protect mothers and babies.

Commented to husband a couple of nights back that I will probably be one of those women who will die at childbirth if I was born in the olden days where birthing were done by midwives.

And now, on to the next step of pregnancy - packing the hospital bag and coming up with baby names.

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Night time toilet training

Not that I'm doing the toilet training much. Little Miss 3 has been keeping herself dry at night and we haven't had to change her sheets since she decided to wear her panties to bed about 2 weeks ago.

She's probably been dry for a long time now, but we're just too lazy to get her into her panties at night. But I'm glad we went with her suggestion to go without nappies because it's saving us tons of money!

I've heard so much horror stories of parents waking up in the night to change sheets and some had to change the mattress because there was just so much wee, I have held back with the night time toilet training. Another excuse? I was horribly sick with morning sickness.

But one good advice given by all parents is : Do not rush, let your child decide at their own time.

How very true! It really saved us a lot of hard work and sleepless nights. No doubt the expenses spent in buying and throwing away nappies was huge, but we're glad we let her decide on her own. Hopefully this next bub will follow in her sister's footsteps and be just as mature and well-behaved. Sphere: Related Content